You resolve (again!) to clear your clutter. You spend a morning trying to make some space. At the end of the morning, you look around and your home doesn’t look any different. Maybe it even looks worse. There are more piles than there were before you started. You’ve no idea where to put half of the stuff you’ve unearthed. You’ve held onto things that you think you should probably have let go.
And you give up. What’s the point? It hasn’t made any difference and now you’re exhausted and frustrated to boot.
Change of subject coming…
(It gets relevant again. Bear with me!)
Last week, while writing an email to the Green and Tidy community, I sent a test message to myself to see how my mail looked, then went back to edit the mail…only to realise I’d pressed ‘send’ rather than ‘test’ and my message had gone out before I was happy with it.
Admittedly, the message I sent had been nearly ready. If it had been at an earlier stage, I might have been less philosophical about it. 🙂
As it was, it was a great reminder.
We set ourselves high ideals. Impossibly high sometimes.
And it’s actually OK if we don’t always live up to them.
Those impossibly high ideals don’t help us. Because every time we don’t reach them, we get discouraged.
We end up feeling hopeless. And next time we give up before we even start.
When you find yourself discouraged because you didn’t live up to your own expectations, try looking at it another way.
Here are two ways I find helpful.
1. It’s OK not to be perfect
Who do you know that’s perfect?
We’re all human. Messy, irrational, selfish and struggling to be the best we can be.
Who do you love despite their imperfections?
Who do you love because of their imperfections?
Our imperfections make us lovable.
Perfect is unattainable. Unapproachable. Off-putting.
When you’re in someone’s ‘perfect’ home, how do you feel? Relaxed? Comfortable? Or afraid to move in case you put something down in the wrong place?
How do you want people to feel in your home?
I want to do and be the best I can.
I also want people to feel they can approach me, communicate with me, ask me for help.
Sometimes, not being perfect can even be a relief.
Let yourself off the hook. It’s OK not to be perfect.
2. You ARE perfect
The world just is. Everything in the world just is. There are no reasons for anything.
And it’s perfect.
It may not be the way you want it to be. You may not be the way you want to be.
But that’s just your opinion. And if that opinion makes you unhappy, how about switching it for another one?
How about taking on that the world, your home and you (yes you!) actually ARE perfect?
From that position, you have room to move. It’s peaceful. There’s no pressure.
And you have choices.
You can change things if you want to.
Not because you have to. Because you choose to.
Do me a favour this week. Try on one (or both!) of the above and comment below to let me know how you get on.